Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Response to Christi's tag and thoughts from this week

Harper tagged me to post either the 1st picture in my 8th file or the 8th picture in my first photo file. Since the one in the 8th file is of me eating . . . I'm choosing the 8th photo in the 1st file . . .


That's Angie and Philip Likens at their rehearsal in Hot Springs AR. What a great weekend!

This Week:
This has been a hard week. Sunday night I discovered that I was spotting a little, always a scary moment for an expecting mom, especially one who has experienced miscarriage before. Monday morning we made an appointment to see a doctor at our clinic. For whatever reason, I told Callen as I was changing him right before I left for the clinic . . . "Whatever happens, we will choose to be thankful!"

It was clear very quickly on the ultrasound that our sweet baby had stopped growing somewhere around 5 weeks. Something in me seemed to already know that, because the shock of the news didn't seem to hit so hard. Don't get me wrong, I cried. I have been very sad. But something had prepared me for the moment. And let me go ahead and also give props to the sweet, gentle ultrasound tech Jan . . . so hard for her to give that kind of news, but her heart was tender and geniune. She mourned with us.

I think it has been both harder and easier this time around. Harder because we had already announced the news to friends and family near and far. To take back that kind of news is difficult. I know there will be awkward moments in the coming weeks when people who have not yet heard will inevitably ask the question. Lord give me grace and strength in those moments. It has been a bit easier because I have known what to expect physically. The emotions are the same, and not necessarily easier.

Callen has also been a GRAND JOY these past two days. God has truly blessed Mark and I with a wonderfully sweet and fun little boy. Callen just lights up when either one of us walks in a room, and who doesn't love that kind of response? He is growing so fast. Yesterday morning when Mark went in to get him, Callen was sitting up in his crib - that's a fun new accomplishment. Well, it was fun until he did it at 2a this morning and didn't know how to lay back down . . .

On Monday afternoon, God planted Job 1:21 in my heart. Later in the day, He reminded me of the refrain of a worship song based on that passage
"You give and take away, You give and take away
My heart will choose to say . . . Lord BLESSED be your Name!"

And just now I looked up the lyrics to the entire song. Oh, the Lord is good.

"Blessed be your name
In the land that is plentiful
Where the streams of abundance flow
Blessed be your name

Blessed be your name
When I'm found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed be your name

Every blessing you pour out,
I turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say...
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be your glorious name

Blessed be your name
When the sun's shining down on me
When the world's all as it should be
Blessed be your name

Blessed be your name
On the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering
Blessed be your name

Every blessing you pour out,
I turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say...
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be your glorious name

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, Blessed be your name"

BY: Tree 63

AND . . . God has pre-ordained a visit this weekend from some of my most favorite people in all of the whole world . . . Billy and Elizabeth Johnson AND Angie S are on their way to Iowa this weekend. Oh, how I love blessings!

Thank you to so many of you for the sweet messages, emails, and voicemails. I love that God has given Mark and I such a wonderful community. We will indeed choose to say . . . Blessed Be YOUR Name oh Lord!

6 comments:

Nate and Natalie said...

Mandy, I am so sorry to hear this news. I am so encouraged by your strength and dependence on God. His path is always good. Please know we will be praying for both you and Mark today, and love you lots.

Mandi said...

Oh Mandy, your strength in this hard time is such a testimony of your faith and God's amazing grace and goodness. I truly am sorry for your loss, but am so encouraged by your attitude. I'm thankful you have such a support system around you to wrap you up in their arms right now.

The Massons said...

mandy i'm so sorry. i can't imagine what you must have felt and are still feeling.

Anonymous said...

Mandy,
I am terribly sorry to hear of your and Mark's loss. What a great truth to focus on in a blurry and uncomfortable world - Blessed be the name of the Lord. If you need to talk, I am here. Unfortunately, I've been there too.

dan+amy said...

My heart hurts with you, Mandy. I'm so sorry. We also have walked through two miscarriages; it's so painful. I'm praying that God's nearness will be evident and that He'll continue to show you His sweet faithfulness. What a treasure it is to know that He truly is so good and faithful even in times of such deep pain.
Praying for you friend. Amy

angie said...

love you and praying for you, mandy.